Sunday, November 05, 2006

Day 11: Big problems, simple solutions

We thought it would be nice to see our friends for a change, so we made one-day road trip. We have at least 10+ friends, that we have promised “to visit soon”. In the past there were lots of good and bad reasons not to see them, but now the sudden steadiness of our near future has given us the opportunity to “live the moment”. The biggest headache you get when travelling with the family is the packing. You have to remember spare clothes, food, fun&games, tissues, snacks, drinks, spares for spare clothes, diapers, vitamins, medicine, keys, money, etc. The second headache starts after the first minute of driving: you have to provide entertainment for the children. When you're trapped in a hot (or freezing) car with 5,000 kilowatts of pure screaming power, you have to be causious. One wrong move and your mental well-being is destroyed.

Since the lucky break of becoming a millionaire, I decided to overcome the difficulties of travelling – no matter of the cost. I gave it a long thought and then the Answer came like a lightning from the clear sky. It was the ultimate and most simple solution for my problem. Of course it hadn't crossed my mind in the days when I was still a regular guy, but now the money has given wings to my imagination. And the answer was very simple: disgustingly exaggerated overspeeding. Yes, put the pedal to the metal and your problems are out of the rear window!!! First, you don't have to pack so many things for the road since you're going to arrive to the destination earlier. Second, the kids will hold their breath when you are overtaking every car on the road and trying to avoid hitting the oncoming cars. Third, if I get caught of overspeeding, I can bribe the police (benefit of being a Big Fish). So please MTV, pimp my station wagon (while my Audi is still being delivered)!!!

(Note from the author: Do Not Try This At Home Or You Are Going To Get Hurt Big Time).

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